This is not a post with New Year’s Resolutions. I just don’t see the point in making them. What this post is? Well, let’s call it an examination of my goals for 2019, the exciting and the mundane. The ones that will take work and the ones that are going to come easy.
This year, I am going to focus on doing the things I need to do for me. If that means cuddling all day with my cat, so be it…if that means completing an entire cross-stitch project in a day to satiate the need to stab something, so be it…if that means booking and taking a flight to London while the consequences at home be damned…you get the idea here, right?
The first thing I am doing is separating myself from toxic relationships. Now, I know that everyone has a different definition of what a toxic relationship is. For me, if you stress me out and cause me more tears and anger than laughter and joy…and you are fully capable of being a decent, non-frustrating person…you gotta go. Yup, if you know me well, you know exactly who I am cutting out.
The second thing I am doing is setting up daily and weekly routines that allow me to make sure that I do not only the normal daily stuff that is sometimes really difficult for me to care about making a priority. These routines will also allow me to set aside time for things like coding, cross-stitch, reading and other things that sometimes get shoved to the side.
The third thing I am working on is getting my finances in order so that I can do three things and the order that I list them here may or may not be the true order of priority.
- Pay off all debt
- Go Back to London in 2019
- Try to find a place of my own
I know that my family is going to fight me on two of those three. I’ll say it here and now, I don’t give a fuck what they think. The relationships are strained to a point I won’t mention here at this time. London makes me happy…I’m going back to London. I can’t deal with the control people have decided they can exert over me just because I am disabled and am the one they can physically control. Yes, one of them actually said that. I am getting my own place and will ban certain people from the premises. Even if I can’t get my own place this year, I will at least rehab my credit score by getting the debt paid off. One way or another, and sooner rather than later I will have a place of my own.
Many thoughts and prayers for you sweetie. I lived in your neck of the woods for a bit, so hit me up on my DMs, if you want me to help you look for a place.
I think this goes without saying but goodness do I love you